This and That

Resume'

by Dorothy Parker
Razors pain you; Rivers are damp;
Acids stain you; And drugs cause cramp.
Guns aren't lawful; Nooses give;
Gas smells awful; You might as well live.

Don't worry, there is no hidden message here... I just like the wit of the poet Dorothy Parker.

The people who decide what signs to place on the road have no direct contact with me. However, I was not doing just that, as I passed a sign, going 72 mph that stated in big, bold letters to "Concentrate on your driving"

Not really concentrating on anything in particular - I could have been retrieving a message off my cell phone, looking through a stack of cd's piled on the seat next to me, watching a fly buzz and bang against the window, clouds in the sky. Any number of things might keep me from ever really concentrating on my driving. In fact, I never give driving a second thought when I'm behind the wheel. Even the sign itself proved to be a distraction as I thought about it for miles and miles wondering if any of the people passing me were concentrating on their driving. I watched people. My guess is no one is.

Turn the key, hit the gas and do everything but take a nap between driveway and destination. That's my approach. A scene from a movie comes to mind. The camera pans around a car as a family travels through the night to reach their vacation destination. Kids and dog are sleeping propped up against each other in the back seat, mom is leaning comfortably on a pillow tucked up between the seat and the window in the front seat, sound asleep. Then on to the dad, Chevy Chase, is behind the wheel, head laid straight back, mouth open and snoring evenly. This scene doesn't end well- screaming if I remember right.

I worked with an older lady many years ago who never married and never had children. She was always bringing pictures of her dogs to us. I thought she was nuts. Dogs in little hats and sweaters that we oohed and aahed over to be polite. Now I'm fascinated myself by Zoey, Jack and Tiffany. They are in a little training session and focused on receiving their treat. Maybe she wasn't nuts.